Fans Waiting On Line For New iPhone Conflicted Over Line Being Longer For Chicken & Rice

1b Halal GuysApple fans have once again lined up in front of the company’s flagship store in Manhattan for the release of the latest iPhone. But as the phones become ubiquitous and some decide its not cool to have the same phone as grandma, the lines have been shrinking. This year the Manhattan line reached an important milestone, as for the first time ever it was shorter than the line for the famous Halal Guys┬áchicken & rice cart a few blocks away. Fans we interviewed were decidedly conflicted on this development

Marketing exec Jason Marquez was delighted. “Look bro, I’ve been doing this every year, ok? The fact that its shorter is a good thing for a guy like me. Its hard work to be this hip and this original by getting the latest iPhone every year. So if I have to wait a bit less, I’ll take it.”

Financial Analyst Albert Rodrigo also didn’t seem to mind. “At the end of the day, those of us with good taste here are going to end up with a Gold iPhone, and those suckers over there are going to end up with diarrhea. I’m on a strict paleo diet anyway. Do they serve chicken and chicken? ”

College student Jenny McDonald was more conflicted. “Like, that’s totally a sad development. First Steve Jobs dies, and now people are more willing to wait on line for street meat that’s not even organic? I’m an anthropology student at Columbia, and I feel like I could totally write a paper on what this tells us about society and the decline of the middle class under Mike Bloomberg. But like, we haven’t covered that chapter yet in class, you know?”

To get a different perspective, we also talked to Habib, one of the yellow t-shirt clad guys working the food cart. Habib had his own theory on what had changed. “Listen, the Apple, they make things too complicated. iPhone and iPad, 5s and 5C, this many gigabytes or that, they give the people too many choices. Here we keep it simple: hot sauce or white sauce? and unlike the Apple, we don’t charge extra when you want both”

 

Previous: Republicans Demand President Obama Make Key Decisions So They Know What To Oppose

 

 

 

 
 

Archive

March 2017
M T W T F S S
« Sep    
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728293031  

Recent Comments